Sunday, December 26, 2010

A Moment..

Guess what! No matter what we do time will consider to go on. However I can NEVER remember what I was doing every minute of everyday. But I do remember moments. I remember moments of love, happiness, sadness, accomplishment, sickness, and even loss. Each of these moments have made me who I am.
LOVE. <3
One moment where I felt loved was at the start of my junior year of high school. I was stressed to my breaking point. I literally cried in my sleep. Well, I went to early morning band and continued to cry as I was about to collapse. I went home because I seriously needed a mental health day, but all through the day I had friends texting me to make sure I was ok. Logan called me during his lunch and stopped by after school. And my mom just held me and let me cry on her shoulder. I felt so loved that I knew that if I ever felt alone in the world I knew I would never be.
Oh geeze. Since Christmas has come and gone it has made me happy. I got the amazonKindle from Santa. Also, tickets to WICKED, from Logan. (38 days) and the piano music to WICKED from my brother Paden. The music made me squeal with joy! haha! Christmas made me very happy. It was a great Christmas. And everyone was happy and loved their gifts. And it was fun to see my nephew's first Christmas. Happiness is easy to come by and keep.
I can't avoid having sad moments, I just try to avoid how long I am sad. Sad moments always hit me like a ton of bricks, I never see them coming. Like tonight I am having a sad moment because I miss my dad. I miss having his influence in my life. The holidays are always hard for my family, and it affects us all differently. I would love to hear if he approves of Logan, and how he would react to being a grandpa. I would love to sit next to him during sacrament meeting and hear him sing his favorite Christmas hymn. (#207 It Came Upon a Midnight Clear) It is little things. I always feel sad when I see the father/daughter dances at wedding receptions. I'm having a rough time, but I always cheer myself up by thinking that my reunion in heaven will be a welcomed one because I know my dad is just as impatient to hold me in his arms again, as I am to be held by my dad.
There is nothing better than the feeling of accomplishment. My favorite moment of accomplishment was anytime I was performing in front of an audience. Knowing that i worked so hard for MONTHS to bring joy to someone in the audience. I don't think I can count all my performances on all my fingers and toes. hahaha! But there is not a great feeling than accomplishment.
Yuck. I hate being sick. And usually it's normal stuff like allergies, or a cold. But still it sucks. I've only been really sick in public once that I remember. It was the first weekend of my Christmas break 2010. Logan took me to the Gateway to shop and watch movies. Well, we were watching How Do You Know and I got massive heartburn. It was uncomfortable but the end of the movie was almost over so I wait. It FINALLY ended and I got up to move and the heartburn turn to nausea. I'll tell you this, Caesar Salad doesn't look pretty the second time. Just saying. Being sick sucks and I wish a REALLY smart person would find the cure to everything already.

Memories are the special moments that everyone should take a mental note of, and then eventually write them down. I have many written down some that will continue to help me through life. But take a moment to remember the moments.

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